FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

Psychotherapy clients work with me on a weekly basis to achieve the best results, and this is my preferred mode of practice to ensure the work gathers momentum and to give you an opportunity to put into practice what you learn about yourself and the kind of life and relationships you wish to have.

For long term clients wishing to maintain results, for those who have undertaken psychotherapy before and are looking to be held through a particular life event, I offer fortnightly sessions. Fortnightly sessions aren’t generally possible until we have worked together for a minimum of six months, to give your progress a chance to gain momentum, and are subject to a discussion in the room together.

Coachees choose the frequency and session duration that works for them, for example fortnightly or monthly, for either 60 or 90 minutes.

This very much depends on your individual presenting issues. To really get to the root of something and help make positive and lasting change, long term work can take 1-3 years.

For specific short term requirements, for example working towards a particular goal at work, or providing a little extra support as you work through a particular life crisis or issue, you may wish to work in a time bound way, e.g three months or six months. If you have a particular time frame in mind at the start (let's say you're moving abroad at the end of the year) then please share it, as it will help to manage the way the work progresses.

Couples work will often be of a shorter term nature (e.g. 3-9 months) as the couple work through a crisis, do a piece of shorter term work to help improve communication patterns, or work towards an ending.

There are no rules however, and you - or you and your partner in the case of couples work - will be the judge of what is right for you.

Absolutely. At the start of each new client relationship, I provide a copy of my GDPR statement which outlines how I treat your data. Information we discuss is kept confidential, but there are two exceptions to this rule - a) in line with the ethical boundaries of the profession I discuss cases with a trusted and highly experienced supervisor and b) where you pose a threat to yourself or others.

Currently I partner with both WPA and Geo Blue, and the number of providers may well increase in the future.

I can either provide a payment link each week (or at the start of each block booking), or invoice you monthly for payment directly into my bank.

My cancellation policy is three working days - if you can't make your session for any reason, then the full fee will be due. Please don't be surprised or offended if I charge you in the event you need to cancel your session within three days - I don't take it upon me to decide what is and isn't a good reason to cancel, it's entirely your prerogative. If you can't come, then whatever the reason it's because it's unavoidable for you - and therefore you being charged is not personal, it's simply necessary to enable me to run Curious&Brave effectively!

Psychotherapy is an umbrella term for talking therapy. There are many different types - some can help with early life issues, some focus on what’s happening in the here and now, some are more gentle and some a little more active. Some focus solely on the mind and some will bring the attention and focus to your body... Some will do all of the above, some of the time, depending on client needs, and this type of therapy is called integrative. I am an integrative therapist, and trained in a number of different theories, techniques and applications, which means that whatever your presenting issue, I can tailor our sessions to suit you and your personality.

Good therapy should facilitate growth - but it is never judgemental. A good therapist will be empathic and challenging where is appropriate, reassuring, kind and clear. They will always have your best interests at heart. You should feel completely safe in the room. But don’t worry if this doesn’t happen straightaway - if you are someone who takes a while to trust others, is naturally wary of others and what they have to say, it is likely that your therapist will evoke similar feelings. The important thing is to work on them in the room, which can act as a microcosm of your experience of everyday life.

It won’t surprise you to know that my first question when people ask this of me is… ‘do you think you need psychotherapy?’ It’s not a trick question. The key is understanding yourself. Your family, friends and perhaps even work colleagues will all have their own point of view… but ultimately, unless you’re really unwell, only you can make that decision for yourself. Therapy can help with loads of common issues - some that manifest in the workplace such as a lack of being able to lead effectively, some that are related to your personal life that spill over to your work life such as a lack of clear boundaries and some that are more contained within your personal life - like relationship issues.

The fact is, that therapy can help with all these situations and many many more, and benefit other areas too. You just need to decide whether a talking therapy is suitable for your personal journey.

If you long for someone to talk to honestly and openly and don’t have that person in your day to day life then perhaps yes. That said, even the person that you see everyday, that you trust, is going to relate to you subjectively, ie through their own personal experiences, and you will both be approaching the relationship through the lens of wanting to keep it in tact and whole. So, in that case, it’s more objective to also have someone in your life who you can completely be yourself with, without censor. Someone who can reflect back what they see, with care and sensitivity - but without their personal agenda in the room as well to cloud things. Someone to help build up your values and true self - or someone to offer a different perspective. All of which is in service to you and your growth.

The easy answer is yes! But… the real and genuine answer has got to come with a caveat, in fact a series of them. Therapy is most beneficial under a certain set of conditions, assuming the baseline of having met a good therapist who you can trust and have the time to meet on a regular basis has been met:

1. You are ready for the commitment

2. You are willing to learn and to grow

3. You are not looking for a quick fix

Being ready for the commitment is about acknowledging that you are about to make an agreement, for your own benefit, to pay regular and consistent attention to your stuff. How do you show up, what drives and motivates you, what irritates you and even angers you. What excites you and pleases you. When do you find relationships hard, how do you respond, why and how are you met by other people. Being clear about what changes you want to see.

By saying you are ready for the commitment, you are taking a really important step that sees you taking responsibility for your own self. And as a therapist, it is a privilege to accompany someone on that journey.

Being willing to learn and grow. Sounds obvious doesn’t it? But the fact is, some people simply aren’t ready for that. They are perfectly happy with some parts of their life, and perfectly happy to be unhappy with other parts - “that’s just me”, “nothing will change anyway”, “if that part of me changes I’m scared everything else will change” - or of course the old phrase “ignorance is bliss” - are all phrases or statements that are typical of someone who isn’t quite ready to embrace personal growth. You just have to work out if your personal answer to this condition is yes I am, or no I’m not. If you fall into the latter camp, therapy is not likely to work or be effective, and you will perhaps not be ready to make the commitment needed. That’s ok - it is what it is. One day perhaps you will be ready.

Looking for a quick fix… Hmm, this is a very common thing indeed. People want a quick fix - we are conditioned to move away from pain or discomfort, and if an opportunity presented itself for a magic wand to be waved and all your troubles would fade away then lots of people would jump at it. However, the journey of self discovery simply doesn’t work like that - think tortoise instead of hare here. Those who come to therapy expecting to have depression lifted within days, or insomnia ‘cured’ within weeks, or to find a deep well of self esteem within a matter of a few sessions are going to be disappointed. If you come to therapy seeking advice on how to drastically improve a relationship… also be prepared that this is a serious undertaking and not something that can be ‘fixed’ overnight, especially because the presenting issue involves one or more people.

That all said, if the three above conditions are met, then therapy has the potential to help a great deal - and it would be fair to say in the short, medium and long term. Clients of mine have come to help themselves heal after a long term relationship has ended, and felt much stronger after only six sessions. Don’t underestimate the power of having someone outside of your everyday circle of friends or family listen to you, be there for you, empathise with you, let you be heard and encourage you to be you. A great many people are so caught up in trying to be who everyone else wants them to be, that they’ve forgotten who is actually underneath the layers of personas and facades they have built up over the years. Therapy can help uncover the real you, and help to set you on a course that better fulfils, nourishes and supports you - in terms of relationships, career, interests, place of work, where you live… the list goes on.

Yes of course, although remember that lasting change doesn’t happen overnight. Therapy is a highly effective means of getting to know yourself better - and can help to greatly alleviate many many psychological symptoms that cause distress, such as anxiety, stress, panic attacks, depression, loss of identity, lack of self-esteem, the precursors to disorders related to eating or weight management and so on. However when you can approach your personal journey with an awareness that it is something that continues 24/7 - not just for 50 minutes a week in a room somewhere, a dollop of pragmatism (it’s not going to get better straight away), and give yourself the gift of time to show up each week, and you will absolutely see results. In this sense the therapeutic process is just like weight loss, getting fit or dieting.

In my private practice I see clients with all of the above symptoms, and the approach that I take with every single one is to tailor make it so that it suits their own set of symptoms, personality style and individual needs at the point they arrive through the door for therapy. Whilst individual growth is something that is very close to my heart indeed, I specialise in fostering family, group and team dynamics - whether that be in the corporate world, or at home within domestic life.

There are so many different types of psychotherapy it can be really hard to decipher the differences between the different branches, and work out what’s going to suit you and the topics you’re entering therapy to work through in the first place.

In this article we’ll discuss two main things that will help to refine the options you have available to you:

1. Who will be going?

2. What type of issue will be worked on?

The first question is who will be attending therapy. Your pool to choose from will be significantly smaller if the person is under 18 – for according to the main accrediting bodies within the UK (UKCP and the BACP) only those who have specific qualifications to see children as part of their practice can do so. The only other way is if a psychotherapist has applied for and received a dispensation from their accrediting body to say they are sufficiently experienced and competently skilled enough to see children occasionally as part of their practice. This may work well for instance if you know of a therapist with a particularly good reputation that you think will be a good match for your child; this dispensation may be all you need to feel comfortable and would be entirely appropriate - but it wouldn’t cover a therapist who wanted to take on a practice where the majority of clients were minors. By the same token, some psychotherapists have trained to specifically work with children, which may mean they have little or no experience of working with adults. So ‘who’ a psychotherapist is trained to work with should be your primary filter. Same applies for couples. A specific couples training is helpful in order to be of most value to clients – the dynamics in the room can often be difficult to navigate for the unexperienced, and the skillset required to work with couples is very different to 1:1 work.

In terms of what issue will be worked on, there are some things to keep in mind. If it is a more generalised issue such as depression or anxiety, then there isn’t a significant need to seek out a specialist therapist. In that case, someone you connect with who is able to create a space you feel is safe and holding, and supported within is paramount.

There are many different schools of psychotherapy, the main ones are called ‘psychodynamic’ and ‘humanistic’, with other offshoots – small branches – bubbling up over the years that have a specific theoretical leaning. Psychodynamic practitioners tend to focus on the relationships you hold – within yourself as well with others, which often are worked back to early life issues such as the quality of relationships you had with your parents. Humanistic practitioners will work extensively with the relationship in the therapy room – for they believe the therapy environment is a microcosm of the client’s wider world in which they live – so by working on that, and uncovering patterns of relating in a confidential and supportive space, in theory it becomes like a dress rehearsal for other relationships you have in the workplace etc.

In truth, as well as your own commitment and motivation, it is the quality of the relationship with your therapist that has proven to be one of the key distinguishing factors in whether it ‘works’ or not. As a client, unless there is a reason why your therapist believes this would be of value, you shouldn’t be particularly aware of the theory that is being applied to what is happening in your therapy sessions. The fact is, that most therapists, even if they identify with a particular ‘school’, will dabble in a range of different approaches in order to be of most value to the client. Those who deliberately choose not to specialise in any one type of therapeutic approach are called ‘integrative’ therapists. Integrative therapists are trained effectively in a number of different theoretical approaches. Therefore they can be really flexible in the therapy room, in terms of how they deal with what is happening, being said, re-enacted etc to best suit the client’s needs. A good practitioner will do this in a way that can not only be heard and understood by the client, but effectively applied outside of the room.

I am an integrative psychotherapist, and have trained in many different schools of psychotherapy and therefore 100% tailor the approach according to who is sat in front me.

Psychotherapy is a long term and highly effective method of developing your own self-awareness, and improving your emotional responses to situations in order to enhance your relationship with yourself, and those around you.

We work at depth, and on a weekly basis, and mainly with your limbic system (or 'emotional brain') to explore the different parts of your psyche that make up your character - your drivers and motivators, qualities as well as areas of difficulty, lived experience as well as past experiences that have strengthened your psychological defences.

Working in this way can induce a feeling of deep vulnerability, and that is why we partner together on a weekly basis, and why it takes time for the process to unfold. But providing you have the all right ingredients - partnering with the right therapist that you feel safe with and can trust, a high degree of willingness and an open mind - you will see fantastic results that will revolutionise your life over time.

Coaching on the other hand, is a highly effective method of helping you find the right solutions to challenges and opportunities that come your way. However, we don't work at the same depth as in Psychotherapy, working instead mainly with the 'ego' as the outward facing part of your personality.

With coaching, you are not likely to feel so vulnerable, and we typically don't work extensively with your past traumas or difficult experiences, although we may acknowledge them as part of your lived experience - whatever it is, we all have our past, and this shapes us for worse and better. For this reason, we don't need to work weekly, and you will see results by partnering with me on what is typically a fortnightly or monthly basis.

As a multi-skilled practitioner, I can offer a hybrid approach, so we work with whatever you feel you need to bring, and no area is outside of my experience or practice. In the rare event I feel I can't wok effectively with you - rest assured I will talk to you about it. We will define the right way of working for what your needs, in our initial conversations before the work begins.